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When Life Hands you a Shit Sandwich, Take a Big Bite. Make him Look like a Dick.

Seriously, giving up is what they want you to do. Since when do you take orders from the sycophants? Did you stop masturbating to your cousin just because your parents told you it was unnatural? NO! Did you stop driving drunk after the second DUI? Hell No! Did you let that restraining order keep you from peering into the windows of your ex-girlfriend? Of Course Not! Did the lock on her door keep you out? Fuck No! Um... I forget where I was going with this... Oh, yeah, don't give up!

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Gingers vs. Albinos

Let's run a little comparison between the two scariest types of humanoids, shall we?
"Albinism is associated with a number of vision defects, such as photophobia, nystagmus and astigmatism. Lack of skin pigmentation makes the organism more susceptible to sunburn and skin cancers." (Wikipedia)


"A human, characterized by pale skin, freckles and bright red hair. "Gingers" are generally considered to be inferior to their more melanin-rich brethren, and thus deservingly discriminated against. Gingers are thought to have no souls. The condition, "gingervitis" is genetic and incurable." (Urban Dictionary)


Fact #1:
Albinism is found outside the human species. In fact, albino animals are worth more to collectors; they are considered "rare" and "valuable".

Gingervitis is not found outside the human species. They are neither rare, nor valuable.


Fact #2:"At least 53 albinos have been killed since 2007 in the east African nation and th…

Getting to Know your Penis

A Practical Guide for the Adolescent Malecirca 1953
Hello and welcome to Getting to Know your Penis. This is where we'll be introducing you to your penis and the magical things that allow your penis function not only as a sex organ, but also expel waste! Pretty cool, eh? Your penis is terribly efficient!

Section 1: Boners Now, you're probably wondering about boners. You've probably heard your mom mention them when she talks about work. What are boners? Are they made of bone? No, friend, the human body has 206 bones in its body, but the penis does not contain any bones. When you're born, you had 270 bones in your body, but most of those fused into other bones and some were removed at your bris by Glenda the Snake Woman. Isn't that fascinating?

So if your boner contains zero bones, what makes it rigid when you rub it against teen girls on the bus? Well, scooter, the answer might surprise you: no one really knows! There are just some questions that science can't …