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Showing posts from September, 2013

Dating is hard

Harder than a boner. Remember when you were in your twenties and dating was hard because you had a huge list of non-negotiables? You had so many expectations and hope and dreams because THIS WAS THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! It was before you had a mortgage, when you could miss a day because your other job of selling drugs would cover it anyway, when drinking wasn't just a coping mechanism, right? You wanted a man who could keep up with you, make your mother livid and make you feel alive. You were vibrant, skinny, cute and ready to take on the world! You had tons of friends, too. You were living life to the fullest! Let's take a look at the progression, shall we? This was my list of dating requirements at 18 in no particular order: he must love dogs has to make me laugh must have a job doesn't want kids doesn't live with parents doesn't know what D&D is has to have own car must love my music not a smoker must be attractive That list kept you from gett