No, seriously, you probably shouldn't read this.

A guest post by @joedonbaker I'm going to change it up by featuring some fellow authors from the Twittersphere for the next few posts. Remember, kids, this guy will cut you. *He submitted this to me 12/8/13, so I'm pretty terrible at posting things quick enough to keep them current. Alternative for Amazon Prime Air I love Amazon Prime. For just pennies a day, I can have things delivered right to my door in two days. For a few bucks per item, I can have things sent OVERNIGHT. I could have this amazing multi-speed blue vibrating anal plug at my doorstop TOMORROW. The future truly is now. Amazon is a pretty ambitious company. They now sell consumer electronics at competitive prices. Of course their hope is that you’ll sign up for Prime and dive balls deep into their ‘ecosystem.’ Amazon is currently trying to solve their biggest demand: Same day delivery, because I just have to have that vibrating anal plug RIGHT NOW. Shipping companies like UPS and FEDEX just aren’t

A guest post by JustMug I'm going to change it up by featuring some fellow authors from the Twittersphere for the next few posts.  The following is a guest piece submitted by the talented, lovely and charismatic  @JustMug . Enjoy! ...a time to dance Mom passed away in September that year. She ultimately lost a long, painful battle against cancer. The mind was willing, but the body was not. In the weeks leading up to her death, she continued to remind our family and friends to have faith, and not be sad. She believed in something greater. Like the caterpillar that transforms into butterfly, she was ready for the next stage of her journey. As a woman of faith, my mom was brave for us when we were most afraid. She accepted death gracefully and even planned her entire memorial service down to the last detail. She refused to call it a funeral, because she wanted us to celebrate her life, not her death. Mom chose one of her favorite bible passages from Ecclesiastes III t