Revenge Fuck You, Patty Everyone asks themselves, "How did I get here?" Well, we are all assholes. Selfish, selfish assholes. We've avenged our bruised egos against ex-boyfriends, ex-bffs, and that merchandiser who wouldn't return our calls but went out with Patty, who had a pretty face, but a really uggo name. Seriously, "Patty"? Why didn't you just name your daughter "mound of meat" instead? But I digress... Have you ever had that lull in conversation that preceded the infamous query "What's the worst thing you've ever done to someone and got away with?" Let's just pretend that this happens and it's not the line people drop on me to weed me out as a potential stalker. If you answer something like, "I ran out of toilet paper, so I wiped with Nana's bootie," I'll assume that living in her basement at age 32 is punishment enough. What's the best revenge I ever got away with? Well, to be c...